The Punishment Room
There are many different rooms in our house where I’ve been punished. Sometimes if I’m punished for a specific offence (like my eating disorder) I will be spanked in the kitchen. At other times, if we have guests, I will be spanked in the attic with either a sturdy thick wooden spoon (which is virtually silent) or the Loopy Johnny. Mostly, however, I am spanked in either the sitting room over the arm of the settee, or over my HOH’s knee. I’m also spanked in the bedroom over the bed, stool or OTK (or a combination of positions – depending on my misbehaviour.)
If I were to choose one room in our house which fills me with the most dread when used for punitive purposes – it would be my HOH’s study. The reason for my heightened fear and subsequent humility is that R’s study doesn’t belong to me. I am no longer surrounded by my own familiar objects, but my HOH’s objects – his very masculine objects. Most of his books, his work, papers, computer and other personal effects are in this room. Somehow, going into this room to prepare for a spanking, is to enter R’s masculine world. It is as if the small room consumes me with his masculine energies– there is nothing feminine or mine in this room, it is his room, his personal space, his study.
Entering into R’s masculine world heightens the feelings of my vulnerability and control he has over me. If I were punished in my bedroom I may be distracted by something of mine, but in R’s study his papers and other work, are of little interest for me to get distracted in. In my room, I would be comforted by my own familiar objects. In R’s study there are none of my objects present – nothing familiar or comforting to draw my attention to. The masculinity of R’s study is highlighted when I am commanded to prepare for my spanking. “Go to my study and prepare for your spanking,” is more masculine (belonging to R) than “Go to your room,” which is more feminine, or “Go to the sitting room,” being more neutral. Sometimes, if R has previously been working at the computer, I can still smell his manly musky odour, or aftershave, as I wait for him to enter the room. Being surrounded by his manly aroma as I stand in the corner nude awaiting punishment, will only act as a reminder and reinforcement of his manhood. This consequently taps into my womanhood and renders me much more humble, submissive and contrite – it truly focuses me without the various distractions, to prepare for my punishment with heart, body and soul. It truly focuses me to accept his punishment with the utmost submission and respect - to cry freely and be redeemed by my HOH, through his loving correction and forgiveness.
Another reason why the study is effective in facilitating my humility and submission is that at school misbehaviour was usually dealt with corporally. If we misbehaved we were punished in the Head Masters study across his desk, usually with the cane. This memory from my school days is very poignant; it was very embarrassing to have ended up in a situation where your regulation school knickers were pushed down to your knees and your bare bottom was in full display awaiting the Head’s attention. Just the sight of R’s desk conjures up memories of past disciplinary spankings at school – I was actually only ever spanked like this once, but the painful humiliation (which was a lot worse than the caning itself) was so embarrassing that it psychologically felt as if there had been many more times! This memory of having been spanked by the Head, having my bared bottom displayed to his gaze as a well developed curvy teenager, has plagued me, even into adulthood!
Just as R’s study evokes feelings of fear, so do more “masculine” looking implements. The implement which fills me with the most fear is my HOH’s belt – especially if he has been wearing it and especially if I can both see and hear it being unbuckled and sliding out of his belt loops. The strap, Loopy Johnny, cane, paddle and tawse, I equally fear. These are mostly dark and masculine looking in their appearance – I know they mean business! When compared with the more feminine implements, such as a feminine hairbrush, pink flip-flop or more elegant female belt. If a slipper or gym shoe is used then the sight of R’s large gym shoe will evoke the same dread more easily than the sight of my own much smaller gym shoe, especially if he takes it off his foot in my presence before aiming it across my buttocks.
A variation of R’s study is his garage/workshop. Again this is his own personal space, full of his own very masculine looking objects. Awaiting punishment in R’s masculine domain I feel the presence of his masculine energies consume me. I feel his masculine presence surrounding me before my punishment spanking. Such feelings evoke and awaken the very core of my humility, submission and femininity. Such feelings awaken the very core of my womanhood.
The artwork is Patty's which can be viewed from: www.pattysgallery.com/wordpress/Creative/